all right, so today i was hanging around waiting for my family to get back, as so we can play all the versions of monopoly that we own (normal, boston, star wars, and POKEMOOOOOOON)...shit yes. so it was taking some time. so i was all like
"I KNOWS WHAT I WILL DO........I'LL INVITE CONAN OVER TO CHILL FOR A FEW..."
so. i did. \\
had to get ready first, yo.
first. i sprayed myself with some h to the 2 to the o. as so i wouldnt smell, yo.
oh yes, that is the ticket. NBEWHAHAHAHA.
then i did put on some hair spray.
and did some ghetto syling moves as to prepare myself mentally and physical for our afternoon frolick.
two fingers like a russian!
uh uh uh uh.
so conan was like
"what you wanna do?"
i was like "dont get so close to me"
and he was like.
he thought we could play soccer and did a sexy pose:
and i was like
FUTBOOOOOOOL IS FOR BIAAATCHEEEES
so i thought we could go do some stuff like...
hang out and pet the wild LIIIIFE.
but it all went horribly wrong.
::::::::BEWARE GRAPHIC IMAGES BELOW:::::::
OH EM GREEEE!
so i was like
"I AM SO SORRY CO-NAN LET ME WASH OFF YOUR WOUNDS!!!!!"
then we were magically OTUSIDIEIED!
and someone appeared!
"HELLO MY NAME IS SWAGFNAKJGJAA THE GERMAN SLKDFSALKFSALK SPECIALIST"
i was like "OH MY CAN YOU HELP HIM!?"
and i made a retarded sort of face
and another one for good measure
and she was like
"MORON I AM A CERTIFIED LKJS SPACLEIDAKLA..........SJFSJ! HERE IS MY PILOTS LISENCEN"
and i was like "YEAAAAH FIX HISSSSSSSSSS"
so she says
BANDAID STICKAGE POOOWAAAAAH!
i thanked the special airplane person or whatever and conan and i, we went on our way so damn good.
he was like "hey baby"
but he wasnt very attractive, as his face was dripping green goo-ism
he took a birdseed bath but no birds came.
and he was like "GIMME SOME SUGAAAAH!"
i was offended as he was gross.
so instead i licked his face.
then i was offended, as that was gross.
clean tongue with HOSE!
CLEAN OFFENSIVE CONAN WITH HOSE.
and we parted ways!!!!